Fair Fun

Toward the end of last week I was getting bummed out because it looked like I was going to be missing the State Fair again this year. There just aren’t enough hours in the day or days in the week. I really wanted to take Sam to the Fair, because I knew they weren’t planning on going and I thought it would be a cool Aunt Kelly and Sam trip (I am, after all, all about the cool factor). I mentioned it to Ashley and she thought it was a good idea, and after some rearranging of my schedule it looked like we were all set. Woo hoo! I’m going to the fair, I’m going to the fair! Bring on the food, fun, and obnoxiously expensive fair-related items, I’m stoked! (By the way, in lieu of their current slogan "Celebrate what's Great!", I think it should be "I'm stoked, let's go broke!")

The plan was for Sam to spend the night with me Friday night and then we would get up bright and early Saturday to head to the fair. All went according to plan, and at 7:30am we were pulling out of the driveway heading to Raleigh. Since we got there early, we got a great parking place and didn’t have to wait in line for tickets. The rides didn’t open until 10:00, so we had time to walk around and figure out where things were (and have this conversation about a hundred times: “ooo can we do that?!” “we’ll see, they aren’t open yet. Don’t worry we have plenty of time today”). We went to see the farm animals since nothing else was open yet, and watched a little bit of the cow show (you know, like a dog show but for cows. I do not pretend to know the technical terms for all things agriculture, hence ‘cow show’). Sam picked out who he thought the winner should be and then we moved on. We saw baby chicks, piglets, a big mamma jamma turkey (stuffing anyone?), cows, cows, more cows, and some horses. Oh, and then Sam learned how to milk a cow. He did great with it, although I couldn’t help but wonder what that cow was thinking. I mean, having to stand there all morning while tiny humans line up to pay $2 to pull and yank on your nether regions (almost surely incorrectly)? I’m surprised she wasn’t drop-kicking kids left and right. And there were 4 other cows lined up that I can only assume were the 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th, and 5^th string substitutions after they felt Bessy had enough. Anyway, before I get carried away, let’s move on. We walked around some more, each second ticking by ever so slowly and Sam asking me every 2 minutes if it was 10:00 yet. It wasn’t in an annoying way, but in a I’m-so-excited-I-can’t-stand-it way. We found one thing that was open before 10:00 and it was the bungee jumping. You know, where they put you in a harness and you bounce on a giant trampoline with bungee cords. Of course I let him do it, all the while thinking, “Sure Mr. Man who looks like he’d rather be anywhere but here, I’ll let you strap my 6 year old nephew in that thing and adjust it so that he bounces clear to the moon and back, no worries, I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.” Especially when he started doing backfilps. Yowza. But he made it out of the bungee death trap in one piece, and by this time it was finally 10:00. I bought some ridiculously overpriced ride tickets and off we went. He rode one ride and then wanted to play some games. These games are insanely overpriced, by the way. I may as well have just said “here’s my ATM card, have at it”. $5 for 3 darts?? Seriously? How do you sleep at night? Probably with one of your cheap ass Styrofoam stuffed animals for a pillow. Anyway, he threw some darts and popped some balloons, and won a stuffed frog about the size of my hand. But wait! For 3 more games he can pick whatever prize he wants! Arrrggghhh. I spend the next minute listening to the Dart Lady haggling me to pay for 3 more games, and Sam wanting to play because he really really really wants to get the big Mr. Wuf, and me trying to say hell no (but in a nice way of course). Finally I tell Sam we are going to compromise. If he plays 3 more games here, we aren’t going to play anymore games the rest of the time at the fair. No ring toss, no basketball throw, no anything else that is impossible to win. He agrees, and proceeds to throw 9 more darts. He wins of course, and gets his Mr. Wuf (which he tells everyone on the way home that he played darts and won a Mr. Wuf for free! Um, not quite. Make that a $20 styrofoam stuffed Mr. Wuf). So off we go to find more fun fair stuff to do. He rode the swings for the first time and loved it, which made me happy because it was my absolute favorite ride at the fair when I was little. He had pizza, cotton candy, ice cream, Dr. Pepper, and lemonade. I had a frozen chocolate covered banana because they are my absolute favorite at the fair. And before we leave, he wants to get one of the 5 foot inflatable baseball bats. He spotted them as soon as we walked in at 9:00am, and I quickly told him I was not carrying that thing around all day, that we would wait until it was time to go. Well of course they are only offered as a prize at one of the booths where the guy guesses your weight, age, or birth month. Since I was not in the mood to be insulted (by having him guess my weight or age), I gave Sam some money and put him on the chopping block. We decided to go with weight. Luckily, the guy guessed him 9lbs too heavy and we “won the baseball bat for free!” And thank goodness, because I wasn't quite sure what I would have done if he had guessed right, since I had promised Sam the baseball bat. I'm sure it would have involved a lot more $$$ on my part. By the way, I apologize to anyone who was hit with that darn thing while Sam was carrying it. So, by this point we were tired, full, out of tickets, and couldn’t really carry anything else. Oh, and I was broke. Not really, but I felt like I’d been robbed. We headed for the car and I watched the mass mob of people who were heading into the fair and stuck in traffic trying to get to the fair. Suckers! You should have come early, then you could be heading home at 1:30 like us. All in all it was a really fun day, and hopefully a fun new tradition for Sam and me.

And, I learned a valuable lesson: when I have kids, they’re going to the fair with Ashley.

Cat Tales

I'm not a crazy cat lady (promise! at least not yet anyway...) but these pictures were funny. So naturally I created dialogue to go along with them, as I'm sure it is exactly what they were communicating to each other. Gabby is the bigger gray and white cat, and Izzy is the skinnier brown torti.



Izzy: Check it out! The window is open! I'm totally psyched. I used to live outside before I was rescued you know.
Gabby: Cool! She's never opened it before. Does this mean we can get outside?
Izzy: Hang on, I'll check.



Izzy: Nope, the perimeter is sealed.
Gabby: Oh.


Gabby: I think she saw us! Act natural...
Izzy: Oh look, a bird!


Gabby: Act natural! You look all tense, she will suspect we're up to something.
Izzy: I can't help it, we ARE up to something!


Gabby: See? Act natural, like this.



Izzy: How's this?
Gabby: A little more lounging, a little less GQ.



Me: A-ha! She's after my money!

Weird Week

What a week this has been. It started off great, and has slowly been going downhill, but now with the weekend on the horizon I think it's back on the up and up.

The week started off with some good news: due to the topic of our research project, we were assigned a different interim advisor. And it is someone I like! Score 1 for Camel College. Then, after another hour long teleconference Monday evening, we finally settled on our research question. Score 2 for Camel College. It was such a relief to know that we can finally start working on our project and I was a little... dare I say... excited about working on it. Well, the excitement was short-lived. Fast forward to 2 days later when our advisor emails us a paper that was published a few years ago, essentially our exact same project. Score ZERO research project. So we are back to square 1... have to figure out how to put a different spin on our topic. Sigh.

And apparently my Sunday afternoon of baking muffins and Halloween cupcakes with the kids left me with a terrible, horrific, unimaginably awful cold this week. Okay, maybe I exaggerated a teeny bit, but I seriously have felt like crap since Wednesday. Three boxes of kleenex later, and today is the first day that I feel even a little better (and my face still feels like it was run over by a car tire). Susan Claire strikes again.... I swear that child never gets sick without giving it to me. Honey, I appreciate the Auntie love, but if you keep this up we're going to have to not see each other during cold and flu season (which you wouldn't like, because you'd miss out on Christmas and Birthday presents from me). So anyway, I sound horrible, feel somewhat horrible, and we're heading to Boone for the weekend after work today. We're going to Tweetsie tomorrow and then participating in the Free to Breathe 5K on Sunday. I'm excited, I love the mountains this time of year. I just want to go sit on the Parkway and soak up all the Fall-ness and the pretty leaves and buy a pumpkin and drink apple cider shop in the General Store and I've gotten carried away so I'll stop. I just hope this cold will let me enjoy the weekend with my family.

OH! So this morning I am walking in to work, and the doctor in front of me looks super familiar. OHMIGOSH! He looks EXACTLY like Darius Rucker!! Like, totally his twin! I was star struck, even though I knew it wasn't a real celebrity.... but still! He looked just like him! And what if I really did run into him someday, what should I say? Can I have your autograph? Will you sing "Hold My Hand" for me?? Or would you rather sing something from your solo act, say, "Alright" or "Don't Think I Don't Think About It"?? I was fighting the urge to shout out "Hootie!!!!! (I mean) Darius!!!!!"

Ahhh. It was a good morning.

Waaaa

I'm sick with a terrible cold. And I'm tired of being sick and feeling like death. So I'm taking the it's-my-party-and-I'll-cry-if-I-want-to approach (see photo above). Especially since we are going to Boone this weekend and I don't want to be miserable at Tweetsie and the Free to Breathe 5K. Cold, you've worn out your welcome.

Manners (or Common Sense?)

Ok people. I don’t claim to be an expert on manners or anything (or maybe I do), but I feel the need to explain a few things. Perhaps you were absent that day in elementary school when some of these things were covered, perhaps you don’t know any better because you weren’t led by example, or perhaps you just don’t care (in which case you piss me off). Working at a hospital, I see and interact with a lot of different people throughout my day; doctors, nurses, patients, caregivers, even the FedEx or UPS man. In doing so, I encounter things daily that just really get under my skin. For example:

Hallways: Silly me, but I think it is polite to speak to someone you pass in the hallway. You don’t have to say much; ‘good morning’, ‘hi’, or even just a smile would do just fine. Especially if we make eye contact. I can’t tell you how many times I speak to someone and they straight up ignore me. Dude, I’m not having the best day either, and I’m most likely walking in the hallway because I need to take a lap and cool off after talking to the latest ‘Ms. Swan’ or dealing with the latest attack-of-the-village-idiot. But I smiled at you dammit, so the least you can do is smile back. Oh, and this whole there’s-four-of-us-in-our-posse-so-we’re-going-to-walk-four-wide-down-the-hallway has got to stop. In case you haven’t noticed, there are other people walking the opposite direction, and it is not appreciated when you roll your eyes, sigh, barely move and leave thismuchroom for me to walk by (emo students and teenie bopper volunteers? I’m talking to you).

Elevators: Contrary to your belief, you are not the only person in the building wanting to use the elevator. I know it is hard to imagine that when the doors open there might actually be someone inside wanting to get out. So when you can barely wait for the doors to open wide enough to fit your body through and you’re already walking into the elevator, why do you look so surprised and shocked when you run into someone? How weird! Someone is trying to get out! Maybe I should not huff and puff and act like it is their fault for running into me! Say it with me: People inside get off first. Then you go inside. Should we put up a sign to help you remember, or perhaps a traffic light?

Corners/Doorways: Unfortunately there are not mirrors at every corner to see if someone is coming. Run-ins will happen, and even those awkward I’ll-go-this-way-you-go-that-way dance interactions where you toddle back and forth until you finally figure out which way to go to avoid slamming into the other person. But seriously? I am so tired of being the only person to say ‘excuse me’. It is no one’s fault really, or maybe it is both of our faults. But every single time I am the only one to say excuse me, like it's my fault for just being there. I try to say ‘forget it! No more being nice! Put on your death stare and attack!’ but it feels so mean that I can’t do it (I know right! I can’t believe it either). And if you are particularly obnoxious about it (rolling eyes, seriously not moving out of the way at all, or otherwise acting like the entire encounter is all my fault), you will most likely get an ‘excuse YOU’ with a side of eye roll from me.

So in other words? Stop acting like I should move aside and roll out the red carpet just because you are walking down the hall/getting in the elevator/walking around the corner. My patience is wearing thin and I didn’t have much to begin with. Thank you for attending this educational training session on how not to piss me off.

This and That

Wow am I bad at this. It has been a good while since my last blog… I really was hoping for at least a once a week post but Fall has kicked in which means it’s back-to-busy for me. Dance has started back, and I’m teaching two nights a week this year. Plus I’m starting my project for my masters program (the only thing standing between me and GRADUATION in May, woo!). A few things have happened since my last post, so this post will most likely be all over the place and quite random. I’m going with the approach of “here’s what popped in my head as I’m typing this”.

I am so excited for Fall! I just got out my Fall decorations (candles, table centerpiece, etc.) and they make me super excited. I’m going to have to hold on to this Fall excitement for a while, because I fear my Christmas decorating will be a bit of a bust. See, for the last several years I’ve kept my Christmas decorations in a big Rubbermaid container and I kept the container in a closet during the year. Once I moved in my house, I realized I had an attic that I could store (read: shove up there and forget about) things in, so I put my Christmas container up there. Unfortunately I realized about a month ago that I have about 10 Christmas candles in that container, which has been in the 100+ degree heat in the attic all summer. Needless to say I’m not looking forward to unpacking that box. For now, I think I'll go buy a pumpkin and be festive in all the Fall pumpkin-ness.

Last week I went shopping after work because I needed to pick something up from A.C. Moore. As I pull in to the parking lot, I realize that I'm in trouble. There before me is a shopping mecca; A.C. Moore, Total Wine, DSW, and PetSmart all in a pretty little row. Ahhhhhh I could hear the angels singing. How could I ever survive such a thing? That is just cruel punishment having those stores right next to each other. I'd never make it home with my bank card in tact. I barely survived A.C. Moore. They had all of their Halloween crafty goodness on displays right when you walk in the door. Immediately I'm having visions of scary shaped cookies (using the halloween cookie pan), Fall flower arrangements (2 for $5!), cute scarecrows and bows (for my mailbox!), make-your-own Halloween cards (which I totally have time for, nevermind the fact that I never do Halloween cards) and more more MORE! When marketing people sit around and decide how to make these displays, I'm the person they are thinking about. The person who immediately thinks "hey, I can do that!" or "I totally need that or I will not feel complete" or "Oooo pretty! Must have it." Luckily, I made it out of there with only what I went in there to get. Ok mostly just what I went in there to get... but hey, it's progress. I decided to skip Total Wine as a favor to my liver and headed straight for DSW. When I walk in you can literally see the heavens open up and hear the angels sing. Row after row after row after row after row of shoes shoes shoes shoes! I went down every aisle, tried on many, and managed to buy only one pair. One perfect pair of black sling backs. They rode home with me on the front seat because I just had to look at them. Sigh. It's the little things.

After getting two weeks behind schedule, we FINALLY got our advisor assignments for our research project. We were given a timeline at the beginning of the semester, and the fact that we are two weeks off track is making me seriously nervous. I twitch just thinking about it. Get organized people! Serious Type A/slightly self-diagnosed OCD people like myself cannot handle your complete disregard for organization and timelines. Type A's unite! Ok anyway, we get our first email from our advisor, and so far so good because she was our first choice. Oh but guess what! She's having a baby, like, next week, and while she's out on maternity leave Teacher A will be her replacement. Well Teacher A just happens to be the pain in my ass and thorn in my side and gives-me-a-headache-after-every-class from spring and summer semester. Sweet! Now I'm totally psyched to begin my project. NOT. I was waiting to see what slap in the face I would get from Camel school this semester and they delivered with flying colors. By the way? Getting your masters is seriously overrated.

Tonight at Sam’s ballgame Susan Claire decided to be our entertainment. She never really pays attention to the games anyway, so her entertaining antics keep her busy. We sang songs , played Go Fish (or something like it) with princess paper dolls, and she and Papa went to “order some popcorn”. My favorite part of her shannigans tonight would have to be when she came back with her bag of popcorn. She walked up to each of us (me, mom, dad, Paul, and Gail), handed us one piece of popcorn, and said “Bless the Lord”. We were having Popcorn Communion.

Work has been a little crazy lately. I’ve been super busy, and that is actually a good thing because I think I function better under pressure. In my job I deal with a lot of different people and have to depend on other people sometimes to get things done. Lately, I feel like every time I get off the phone with someone, or get an email from someone, I just want to bang my head on my desk. It’s like dealing with Ms. Swan. If you are not familiar with Ms. Swan, please see the link below. It’s quite hilarious on the show, but in my real life I assure you it makes me want to strangle someone! Somehow, saying “You are an idiot. How do you make into the building from your car everyday? Am I not speaking your language? DO YOUR JOB!” doesn’t seem appropriate, so I just bang my head on my desk instead. Sigh.

Ms. Swan

I was so mad today when I left work I could have spit nails. God has really been testing me lately with patience, and I have been struggling. Then today I get in my car for the 45 minute ride home, and I turn my music way up so I can blow off some steam. What song comes on? Kenny Chesney, “I’m Alive”. And all is well again. For now.