That's a Wrap

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, how bare and ornament-less are your branches. Yes, I have a sad little tree this year. Most of my ornaments are still in the box, and the lower quarter of my tree is bare. Because SOME people can’t keep their paws off of it.

Tonight I had the brilliant idea to start wrapping presents. I was hoping that if I could occupy the space under my tree with presents, then maybe my crazy kitties would stop using it as a bunker. I got out the wrapping paper and discovered that this simple act alone of putting it in the living room floor was enough to send them into orbit. All of this paper?? On rolls?? Rolls and rolls of paper?? Let’s run back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and wrestle and run and jump and freak out! Woo!

Here’s a rundown of how things went after that:

Roll out paper.

Remove cat from paper.

Cut paper.

Remove cat from paper.

Tape one end of present.

Remove cat from paper.

Tape other end of present.

Start over. Cat has ripped open other end of present.

Curse.

Roll out paper (again).

Remove cat from paper.

Cut paper.

Remove cat from paper.

Tape one end of present.

Remove cat from paper.

Tape other end of present.

Start over (again). Curse. Cat has ripped paper (again).

Curse (again).

Roll out paper.

Remove cat from paper.

Cut paper.

Gently toss cat across room.

Tape one end of paper.

Toss cat again.

Realize that tossing of cat managed to rip the paper.

Tape %#@$&*$# paper because I’m tired of starting over.

Hope no one notices shotty wrapping job.

Move three presents that took an hour to wrap over to Christmas tree.

Strategically place presents so that kitties cannot access behind the tree.

Realize I have boxed Gabby in the corner.

Give up.

And even as I’m writing this, I hear the unpleasant sound of paper tearing. Gabby has stuck her foot into a present while trying to climb to the back of the tree. Gift bags anyone?