Another Attack

I love my car. I decided to get a hybrid because I drive a lot (work, school, etc) and I felt it was the responsible thing to do. Yes, it may not have a lot of get-up-and-go, and some may refer to it as a go-kart (MOM), but I get 47-50 mpg and that goes a long way when gas is $3.80 per gallon. I feel like I’m doing my part to help the environment, like in that Nissan commercial where the polar bear travels thousands of miles just to give the guy a hug for doing his part to stop global warming.

So why, I ask you, is Mother Nature out to get me and Rosario (yes, I named my car after Karen’s maid on Will and Grace; don’t ask)? First, there was the now infamous Triple F incident in January. Which, by the way, my family is constantly reminding me about. Nana and I were driving home from Durham on Saturday and when we were approaching the site of “the incident” she starts singing “O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree”. Thanks Nana. I feel the love. Anyway, I was driving to town yesterday morning and had another incident. You know how sometimes birds are in the middle or the side of the road, and as you are approaching they fly away? Well this particular bird was a bit directionally challenged, or just plain stupid. He flew left, right, front, and then BAM into my windshield. My hands flew to my mouth as I shrieked in surprise (and then quickly realized I should probably keep my hands on the wheel so as to avoid yet another incident) and frantically looked in my rearview mirror to see what happened to birdy. About 2 seconds later he spiraled to the ground cartoon-style and landed with a thud. But wait! He’s moving! Maybe he’s not dead! He’s flapping his little wings with all his birdy might! Ok, so he’s not going anywhere, but he’s moving! That’s a positive sign! Ok, I thought, maybe I just stunned the crap out of him and he’ll be ok, and he’ll fly away in a few minutes. Unless of course someone else runs him over while he’s recovering on the side of the road…

I was feeling confident that birdy had flown away and was having a time telling his family how he dove kamikaze style into my windshield. I was so confident in this that I forgot to look for him when I drove home yesterday. So this morning on the way to church, I looked around for birdy. I didn’t see him around the spot where he hit me, so I was relieved and thought he was certainly ok! And then – I saw a dead CARDINAL laying on the side of the road, with one wing still stuck in the air as if to say “I surrender, I surrender!” I cannot believe this! I hit a Cardinal! The state bird of North Carolina! Surely that has to be a crime! I may as well go dig up a bunch of dogwoods or something!

I just don’t get it. I want things to stop attacking my car. I want my polar bear hug dammit! 

The Prayer

The blessing at dinner tonight:


Sam: Thank you God for letting Kelly graduate from high school or college or whatever it was. 


Susan Claire: Sam, it's school! Happy Celebrate! 

For serious?

I have decided one thing for sure: 2011 has a sense of humor! Once again, when I said “bring it on 2011” I didn’t expect it to take me so seriously. As you can tell from the amount of time since my last post, I haven’t had time to write anything lately. Nana fell and broke her shoulder a few weeks ago and required round the clock care for the first 2 weeks. I stayed with her at night and lived out of my suitcase for a while, and completely neglected my house and kitties in the interim. I thought the girls took it quite well, but then Gabby woke me up one morning when I got back by slowly dragging her claws across my leg. Ouch, and point taken. Anyway, it’s been nice to be back at home and in my normal routine, which I’m trying to make include more frequent blog posts. How am I doing so far?

And now it’s time for the portion of our show that I like to call: random thoughts.

I’ve been working a lot the last few weeks on finishing my research project for my masters. A-l-m-o-s-t done. Like, literally 3 more days and then I’ll be done. I’m feeling a little bit accomplished and all that jazz so excuse me while I indulge a little bit in my accomplishment-ness.  It’s taken me 3 years to complete this degree, which is funny because it doesn’t seem like I started that long ago. I went to school while working a full time and part time job, and got way better grades than I did in undergrad when my job was going to school. So imagine my disappointment (or maybe you can’t, because you aren’t as neurotic as me) when I realize that I won’t graduate with top honors. From top to bottom there’s summa cum laude (aka super extra smart), magna cum laude (extra smart), and cum laude (smart). I graduated undergrad as laude-you’re-lucky so I really wanted to get the smarty pants honor cord this time. And as of right now I’m 0.033 points away from the super extra smart one. Do you know how much that bothers me??

Gabby and Izzy are up to something. I can’t figure out what, but I’m sure they are plotting against me. They are being way too good (especially considering I left them alone for 2 weeks) and Izzy especially is being way too friendly. More on that later; I just know something is going to happen.

I am slightly obsessed with the Royal Wedding (yes, capitalized; show some respect). Wills and Kate, Wills and Kate, I can’t get enough. AND it is going to be the best thing ever to finish my project Thursday night and watch wedding stuff all day Friday. I mean work on Friday and DVR all of the wedding stuff. Either way. Exciting stuff! (By the way, watching a lifetime movie about the courtship of William and Kate before bed will cause you to wake up in a panic thinking you are late for the wedding. Followed by dismay when you remember that you’re not invited.)

I am so excited thinking about the next few weeks to come. I’ve got my facebook back now, so I feel connected with the world again. Dance recital is coming soon and after that I’ll have my evenings back. And graduation is coming up, did I mention that is the same day as dance recital? Yeah. Go-go gadget be in two places at once. Anyway, I was thinking of all of these things on my way home the other day and as if on cue the song “1999” by Prince came on the radio. Why, don’t mind if I do party like it’s 1999. Cause I’m that excited. 

*update - no joke? in the time it took me to copy and paste this post from Word into my blog, Izzy launched herself from her snoozed position on the back of the couch into a lamp trying to chase a bug. The lamp is now on the floor, along with a coaster and picture frame. 

To-Do List

WHAT.A.DAY.

I think because I was out sick yesterday that Tuesday decided to behave like a Monday.  Today was just all out ridiculous. I can’t really pinpoint any one thing that went wrong, it is just all kind of a blur. I feel like I blinked and it was suddenly 4:00 and I had no idea where the day went. It was one of those days where I was constantly saying “now what was I doing?” because I kept trying to do 10 things at once. And, at the end of the day I only had one thing crossed off my To-Do list. One thing?? Seriously?? I think that is what bothered me most about today, the fact that after 9.5  hours at work I could only cross one thing off my list when I was busy all day long. Which means one of two things: I am not doing a good job at writing my To-Do list (which is totally not true, I re-write it twice a day… don’t judge me), or people need to leave me alone and stop emailing and calling me with problems that they could fix themselves if they would just do their job!!! Sigh. Anyway, the point being that my To-Do list is obviously  a symptom of my neurotic OCD tendencies. But at least I can admit it.

Then I’m on the way home, trying to calm down after a stressful day at work. That didn’t last long because I got stuck in traffic. It wasn’t until after calling a third person an-ugly-word-that-I-won’t-say-on-here-because-my-preacher-reads-this that I realized I wasn’t handling it well. I needed some music to calm me down. I put on my Coldplay playlist; not sure why, but they calm the crazy. Ahhh. Much better.  I was deep in my Coldplay induced trance when I came over a hill and almost nailed a ginormous huge ugly buzzard that was in the middle of the road (I’m pretty sure given the size of ol’ Buzzy and the small size of my car that had I pulled up beside him we would have been eye to eye). Now THAT would have really just made my day.  Luckily he moved before I could hit him and end up writing a blog post about hitting a buzzard. I told him to buzz off. (ha!! Ok that was probably only funny to me)

Once I get home I am immediately struck with the panic that there are just not enough hours in the day to get done all of the things I have to get done in the next 5-6 weeks. Gone is happy-excited-can’t-wait-to-graduate me.  Enter: panicked-stressed-gonna-pull-my-hair-out me. There’s a meltdown coming, I can feel it. The buildup has already started. Last week I was so stressed that I came home and cleaned up and cleaned out all weekend (it’s a coping mechanism; don’t judge me).  When I’m at work I’m worrying about school. When I’m at home I’m worrying about work. Plus dance recital is coming up and oh yeah I need to finish the project that my graduation depends on. Oh and both Sam and Susan Claire are playing baseball now so there are those games to attend. No sweat! I can do it! I am superwoman! I’ve thought about giving up sleep… but I’m sure that will be detrimental to pretty much anyone I come in contact with on a regular basis. Is it bad that the only thing I'm looking forward to this week is the fact that Rapunzel comes out on DVD? (Um, yes, that movie was hella funny. And yes I just brought back "hella") What's even worse is that this isn't even what I was planning on writing about for this post. But lucky you, I had a bad day and you get to hear me complain! 

One thing is for sure: I picked a HELL of a time to start my diet.

A Mean Motha

Ok, what gives? Was the first day of spring just a joke? I have already put up my winter coat in hopes that I won’t see it again until November, when I’ll pull it out and find a $10 bill that I accidentally left in the pocket. I have already mowed my lawn twice and gotten excited over the smell of fresh cut grass. I have already gone to the baseball field to watch Sam practice and gotten excited at the sound of metal bats . I have already turned my heat off and dusted off my ceiling fans in hopes for a few weeks of a low electric bill. And most importantly, I have already started wearing my Jack Rogers and other fun summer sandals. And now you pull this crap? Temperatures in the flippin' 30s and 40s? I mean come on, we all know that winter is the red-headed stepchild as far as seasons go. Everyone loves summer because it means no school and days at the beach, lake, etc. (and unfortunately some use it as an excuse to wear far too little clothing). Everyone loves spring because it is the first warm weather in months and everyone loves fall because it is a breath of fresh air from the humidity of summer. But no one likes winter. It is too cold, you have to wear too many clothes, and the heating bill is astronomical. The only good thing about winter is the snow, and it never really snows enough to amount to anything. It just gets cold enough to ice a little and screw up everyone’s plans.

So how about this, Mother Nature? Bite me. I may have turned my heat back on but I refuse to get my winter coat back out (fashionable as it may be).  

Friday Funny

This has been a pretty long week. Work, dance, and school all escalated to a level of crazy that was “committed-with-a-straight-jacket” worthy. So today is Friday, a window to the weekend and a little less crazy. I walked in the door at 5:30 and just had to laugh. This is what I found: 

Welcome to my life. Izzy was lying under the chair but of course ran away when I started down the hall to take the picture. The reason the chair is there in the first place probably needs an explanation. The white spot on the wall is where Dad came yesterday and fixed the hole that was there; the hole that was made by Tweedle Dum and/or Tweedle Dee more than 8 months ago. I’m not sure how or why it got there, but I came home from work one day to find a scratch on the wall. Interestingly enough the scratch mark perfectly matched a cat’s paw.  The next day I came home and the hole was even bigger and deeper, going through to the sheetrock. Kitty heads were going to roll. Anyway, it has been there for the last 8 months or so, looking all “here I am, a hole in the wall that needs patching and I can’t get someone to come and fix me” and everything. So when Dad finally patched it yesterday he put one of the chairs from the bar in front of it so that Mo and Curly wouldn’t mess with it until it was dry. So much for that! At least I didn’t come home to white paw prints up and down the hall.  

Girls Night

Susan Claire came to spend the night last night and we had a girls night. When Ashley asked her if she wanted to come to my house she squealed and jumped on the phone to talk to me. She said she would bring girly movies and all of her dress up clothes. So cute!

The last time she spent the night I took her with me to the grocery store to get snacks, milk, breakfast stuff, etc. Big mistake. I ended up leaving with a lot more than I planned to get, like pomegranate applesauce for instance. She assured me that she liked it and would eat it, although freely admitted that she chose it because it was purple. Anyway, this time I got smart and went to the grocery store before I went to pick her up, and it was around 5:00 by the time I got to Ashley’s. Three trips to the car and 45 minutes later we were on our way. I convinced her not to bring the ginormous bag of dress up clothes she had prepared, because my kitties would probably mess them up with their claws. In reality, I didn’t want her bring the ball-o-glitter that is her favorite Ariel dress and end up getting green glitter all over my house. I mean, I’m all about decorating for St. Patrick’s Day but that would be a little extreme. Instead she only brought 2 dresses, in addition to her Cinderella shoes, a crown, 5 movies, her sleeping bag, and her overnight bag (which had 2 stuffed animals and a baby doll stuffed inside).

(Side note: SC is famous for getting me sick. If she has a cold, she always gives it to me. Ashley is sick right now and it did cross my mind that SC could potentially bring the sickness with her. But she was fine, not even a runny nose, so I forgot about it. No joke? Halfway to my house she is sneezing and green stuff is coming out of her nose. I mean really??) 

Once we got home and I unloaded all of her stuff, we settled in to watch a movie. She put on her dress up clothes and her crown, set up her sleeping bag, and then had me waiting on her with snacks and drinks. After a few hours of movies, snacks, bath time, and more movies and snacks, it was bedtime. SC was planning to sleep in the bed with me, which I expected because she says she gets scared sometimes at my house. I also knew from past experience that I was in for a night of not so much sleep. I lay down with her for a little while to get her settled and honestly could have gone to sleep myself. She was talking and playing with her stuffed animals, showing no signs of being sleepy. Hmm… maybe the Hershey’s kisses and sprite she was having a half hour before bedtime weren’t such a good idea? Heh. Then she put her hand on my face and sang Rock-a-bye baby, and 2 minutes later she was snoring. So funny!

I decided to go to bed sort of early for two reasons; one, because I had gotten up early that day for dance and was tired, and two, because I knew I wouldn’t be getting much sleep that night. SC is notorious for moving around in her sleep, and if you are sleeping next to her then you are out of luck. I was in my room for about 10-15 minutes getting ready for bed, and she didn’t move a muscle. Hey, I thought, maybe this won’t be so bad. No kidding? I’m in the bed for less than 2 minutes and she is flopping around like a fish on a dock. I guess she has some sort of spidey sense for when someone is lying next to her. At this point she was in the middle of the bed, so I moved her over to her side and settled in to go to sleep. About 30 seconds later she kicked me in the groin and flopped her legs over on top of me. I moved her over again and tried to go to sleep. A little while later I felt her next to me again, and I looked at the clock hoping at least an hour or so had passed. Nope, just 10 minutes. Sigh. It was going to be a long night.

I woke up about every 15 minutes, and either moved her completely back to her side or moved whatever appendage was draped over me at that point. Wake up, move her, fix covers. Wake up, move her, fix covers. I got clocked in the nose and smacked in the face at one point, and a few more kicks to the stomach. Around 3:30am I finally gave up and left her alone, and tried to salvage the rest of the night’s sleep.  And by the way, when I say she was next to me, I mean she was thisclosetomybody. You couldn’t have wedged a piece of paper between us. For someone who doesn’t like to be touched and certainly doesn’t like to be touched when I’m sleeping, this was mighty uncomfortable. I stared longingly at the entire other side of the bed that was empty and lonely and wasted space. But then I watched her sleeping and I realize it’s not so bad. So maybe I don't get a good night's sleep. It's worth it just to wake up in the morning to a pat on the shoulder and a kiss on the cheek from my favorite niece.  And who am I kidding? I’m sure she’ll sleep with me the next time she comes too. 

Movie, check. Dress up clothes, check. Snack, check. Sleeping bag, check.